Holistic Divorce Counseling

Holistic Divorce Counseling Nicole S. Urdang, M.S., NCC, DHM. Free support, resources, and comfort for all life's issues and transitions.

Recording and Listening: The Healing Power of Your Own Voice November 23, 2016



One is one’s own refuge. Who else could be the refuge?
The Buddha



For years I have wanted to tape a recording of all the things I wish I could say to each and every one of you. Every compassionate, kind, gentle, patient, accepting, affirming, understanding, appreciative, and supportive thought to make you feel as good and right in yourself as you possibly can. I let this idea steep for years. Luckily, waiting was the right choice since I found something better to share with you.


In an interview on the Sounds True podcast between Tami Simon and Cheri Huber, Cheri raved about her process called Recording and Listening. You simply record yourself saying anything you think will help you. It could be gentle reminders of your resiliency, nurturing words of compassion and support, lists of things you are grateful for, meaningful quotes, or anything you wish were being said to you, or wish had been said to you as a child. Hearing yourself say these things out loud is far more powerful than anyone else saying them to you.


As I always like to experiment with new techniques before I suggest them, I downloaded a free app called Voice Recorder from Tap Media Ltd. It is so incredibly simple and intuitive to use I was recording in no time.


At first, this may seem awkward and you might not know what you want to say. Take a few slow, deep breaths into your heart and just see what comes up. As you continue to record things you want to hear you will get more comfortable with the process, even if you think you dislike the sound of your own voice. Be patient, it’s a new skill set.


Of course, half of this practice is actually listening to what you recorded. You can listen any time you want an emotional boost, a reminder of your resiliency, a connection to the part of you that helps you feel safe, or you crave some unconditional self-acceptance. It can also be very helpful to listen before you go to sleep as your defenses melt into unconsciousness and you can open up to really hearing every loving, supportive, emotionally generous thought you have for yourself.


To jump start this practice just go to one of the following chapters on this site and record whatever parts of it you find most helpful:


Affirmations for self-empowerment and emotional freedom


Quotes to life by


Litany of love




Manifesto for emotional self care


Manifesto II: How to write yours


It’s OK Sweetheart


Last but not least, when you’re feeling upset ask yourself what would I really t to hear from someone who loved me right now? Record those caring, kind, patient, gentle, supportive, understanding  words and listen to them as often as you want. They can be incredibly grounding, and provide you with a new perspective when you are drowning in negative or scary thoughts.



Copyright Nicole S. Urdang


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